Made me cry

“2017, Year of the Oscillating Grin”

I’m quite surprised to find myself at the last day of 2017. There are a million clichés about time passing quickly, and I’m loath to mention any of them, but this year really does feel as if it’s gone by … read more

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4.18am Again

This is hard. Really fucking hard.

It’s 4.18am and I’m awake again.

I’m sore and tired and lonely. I feel sick and fed up.

For months and months, pain and nausea have been eroding my sleep, which was already … read more

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Searching for Thais

I remember the first time I ever used Twitter – it’s etched in my memory. It was almost eight years ago on a sunny weekend in July. I didn’t use it to share information – I used it to find … read more

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A Chance For Change

When Teresa May called a snap general election just seven weeks ago I felt a flash of hope, followed by an overwhelming feeling of apprehension.

I desperately want to be part of a society that’s more socially just, where there … read more

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Your Home Or Your Life

I’m incredibly fortunate to own my home. I know that for many people the current crisis in housing makes this impossible, and is likely to do so for future generations. I watch people I care about being held hostage to … read more

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“The Bus Smells of Shit Since You Came In”

Warning: I’ve never provided a warning for this blog before, but today’s post contains explicit language and a description of an experience that some people might find distressing.

The bus pulled up. I saw a buggy in the wheelchair spaceread more

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Justice For Amy

Just over three years ago I wrote a post I should never have had to write. I knew as I typed each searingly sad word about the death of my fourteen-year-old friend Amy that it wasn’t right. Two days ago … read more

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How Can I Possibly Be Lonely?

I wrote yesterday about having had a bad day and feeling sad. It was a spectacularly miserable day, but some of what I was feeling wasn’t completely new. For example, over the last few weeks or even months there have … read more

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What of Lamp-Posts?

On my way home tonight I noticed something I hadn’t paid much attention to before: lamp-posts.

Obviously that doesn’t mean the lamp-post, the one I can see from my bedroom window, because I pay that one a lot of … read more

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Blank October

I’ve just come through to my bedroom to go to bed. The main light was off already and my bedside light was glowing gently. Two Baclofen tablets were laid out ready for me to take, one at midnight, one at … read more

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