Simple. You risk getting an on the spot fine of £80.
During June, Barnsley police are having a crackdown on swearing in public. I’m one of the 10% of people with Tourettes who swear involuntarily, so I took a particular … read more
The lair suddenly seems massive and echoey. The piles of stuff that have been a feature for the last month have all gone. Fat Sister and King Russell moved out yesterday and our friends Harry and Ollie moved out last … read more
I’ve just recorded a new voicemail greeting for my phone. I made several attempts at getting it tic-free but in the end I settled for a message that consisted of twelve words and eight ‘biscuits’.
That’s a ratio of 1.5:1.0… read more
I went shopping earlier to get a dress for Fat Sister’s wedding. While I was browsing I heard someone calling my name. It was my friend Hannah – she greeted me enthusiastically and said, “I heard the ‘biscuits’ and knew … read more
I went to the pub this evening with Harry, Ollie, Fat Sister and King Russell. I didn’t stay long though because I was wriggling all over the place. The pub’s only five minutes from the lair so I thought I’d … read more
I woke up this morning in a reflective mood. Last night along with Leftwing Idiot and Poppy, I saw Mark Thomas’s incredible and thought provoking show, Extreme Rambling – Walking the Wall, currently in its last few days at the … read more
I’ve mentioned the amazing treatment I’ve been having recently at Kings College Hospital. Since I injured my ankle due to a tic, I’ve had help from several different departments there, and the care has been fantastic. This morning I … read more
Now the savage cuts being inflicted by David Cameron on his Big Society are starting to bite, my tics are fighting back with some interesting new training opportunities:
“Lizard comprehension reading scheme.”
“Harry Potter empowerment scheme.”
“Pocahontas allergy training scheme.”… read more
This evening while I was watching telly at home I started to tic vigorously, throwing my head back against the wall. Fat Sister and Ollie acted swiftly and simultaneously, grabbing cushions and thrusting them behind my head. Unfortunately their action … read more
Leftwing Idiot had been doing some DIY this morning and he’d left a saw on the table. I started ticcing, “I know where the saw is” to the tune of I Came, I Saw, I Conga’d.
I asked him … read more