My colleague told me earlier that she’d been really tired the other day and as a result she’d been saying some pretty random stuff. One of the children we work with had said she sounded like me when I do my tics.…

I was at the pub earlier with a group of friends including a mate who’s been staying with Leftwing Idiot over the weekend – she and her fiancé are both born again Christians. My tics inadvertently set her up for an awkward moment:

TH: I love fish.…

Most of my tics sound identical each time I say them but my, “Biscuit” tic is proving an exception, with two very different pronunciations.

Biscuit Vs Bis-cuit

The first is the whole word spoken quickly, with the emphasis on the first syllable.…

Earlier I watched Save the Green Planet with Leftwing Idiot and his mate Nez who’s staying for a few days. I was having a real battle with concentrating because I felt uncomfortable and couldn’t keep still. Many of my tics are accompanied by a strong internal sensation and tonight this was so overwhelming.…

Tourettes appears to be experimenting with symbols. Hearts, hashtags and percentages have all featured in recent tics. Here are a handful of symbolic examples:

“I ♥ cum.”

“#pickledonioncumbottle”

“I’m 40% more biscuity than sheep.”

“I ♥ robot legs.”

“#teacuptits”

“95% of biscuits are birds.”

As we tucked into our meal this evening I ticced, “Hello dinner, I’m going to fuck you up.”

And that’s exactly what I did. Delicious.

I was at Leftwing Idiot’s sitting on the sofa, and he was on his computer. While he was working away he asked, “What are you going to remind me to do?” I ticced some possible answers:

“Give Terry Waite a bath.”…

This is going to be a brief entry as I’m exhausted and feeling under the weather. When I’m not well I get floppy and today I can’t summon up the energy to do anything. Thankfully my tics can’t be bothered either – they’re much less intense than normal.

I have a joyful new tic: “Yay!” It’s usually followed by something random.

Here are a few examples:

“Yay! Sheepdogs.”

“Yay! Hadron Collider.”

“Yay! Lesbians.”

“Yay! Harlesden.”

“Yay! Ramadan.”

“Yay! Black forest gateau.”

“Yay! Yay!”

Yesterday I ticced, throwing my head back and hitting it against the wall: “Mystery.”

This morning I twisted my ankle with a strange leg tic: “Mystery.”

I also hit myself in the face: “Mystery.”

Tonight I banged my hand on a shelf in a shop: “Mystery.”…