A few weeks ago I got a very interesting email from Felix Peckitt, a student, poet, programmer and fellow ticcer. He got in touch to tell me about some investigations he’d been carrying out using the thousands of my vocal tics.…

I got back to the castle yesterday to a lovely surprise – the geranium was flowering.

And mine isn’t the only one – I’ve heard rumour of other geraniums in bud. So I’ve decided it’s time to check in on the many off-shoots of Leftwing Idiot’s original that are now scattered amongst friends and family across the country.…

Late last night we got back to our hotel after an amazing performance of Backstage in Biscuit Land in Norwich, our biggest audience to date. I was seriously tired but happy too. Innes helped me get to bed and I fell asleep quickly.…

When I was out somewhere in London earlier today I saw a fancy designer-lamp-post. It was minimalist, a single metal tube like an upside down capital letter ‘L’.

For a moment I was intrigued, trying to decide if I liked it.…

Yesterday morning I woke up after a much-needed sleep. It was 10am and I was really impressed that I’d slept so late, something I never normally do. The sun was pouring through a crack in my blind and my tics began happily chatting to the light, complimenting it on its good work:

“Light, you’re more dazzling than a thousand rainbows in sequin pyjamas.”…

In ten minutes time it’ll be March. But right now it’s still 29th February, and we’re in the final minutes of this once-in-four years leap year.

Right on cue my tics have bounded in to mark the occasion:

“How many leap years does it take to change a cat into a dragon?”…

Leftwing Idiot and I were in a cab the other day sitting in a traffic jam. I looked up and suddenly started laughing with giddy delight. My tics chipped in:

“Oh lamp-post, discretion is your middle bin.”
“Lamp-post, are you playing hide and seek?”…

Leftwing Idiot discovered something that clearly puzzled and disturbed him earlier this week. We’ve spent the last few days together in Galway for the incredible Creative Connections conference. I was feeling pretty under the weather for most of the time and, as always, this resulted in more ‘ticcing fits’ and less energy.…

Leftwing Idiot sent me an article earlier that made me laugh. Apparently there have been a number of newspaper reports in the last few days warning of potential biscuit shortages as a result of the recent floods in the North of England.…

I’ve had my beloved “biscuit” tic for almost six years now, and soon it’ll be the longest-serving of my vocal tics … but not quite yet. Before “biscuit” there was “squirrel”, by itself, or with variations like “squirrel, squirrel”, “squirrel tits” and even “A squirrel wearing its mum’s jumper.”…