Tears and Tiredness

A week ago I had a minor operation. It involved a general anaesthetic and a small incision in my chest not too far from the spot where my chest-thumping tic hits it hundreds of times a day.

I’m generally mending well but because the wound on my chest was struggling a bit and hadn’t closed properly, I went back to hospital a few days ago where they dowsed me with iodine and re-sealed and re-dressed the wound. Things seem more on track now and I’m in less pain as a result.

Though the pain is settling down I’m still extremely tired, with even small exertions leaving me feeling wiped out. This isn’t helped by the increase in my tics at night.

Exhaustion is taking its toll on my mood and I spent much of today in or on the brink of tears. Tiny frustrations have been getting the better of me; I’ve been getting upset, feeling more tired as result, and then getting upset again.

I broke the cycle with the help of Leftwing Idiot, a lie down, an excursion in the sunshine and a Colombo.

I’ve written this post to remind myself in the future that resting can feel like hard work. But it’s worth doing properly and I’m going to continue to take it easy over the next few days. I’m determined not to let my impatience get the better of me – I know in the long term this will always be the quickest way to get back into kilter.

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