I’ve described many times the difficulties I have with standing up. My tics mean my knees bend uncontrollably so that I suddenly drop to the floor. This poses many challenges.
One of these (that I’m sure I haven’t written about before) is the logistical challenge of trying to pull my trousers up after having a wee. So tonight, as I’m sure you’ll be thrilled to hear, I’m going to do just that.
I can usually get into the loo alright. I take down my trousers while kneeling on the floor in front of the toilet and then pull myself backwards up onto the seat. Once safely there I can usually manage to stay on long enough to have a wee. Then, with the help of a grab rail, I can even deal with wiping.
But after that it gets tricky. Pulling my trousers up with one hand takes a while and usually involves me dropping to the floor several times before the job is completed satisfactorily.
My current favourite solution accepts the floor as a part of the process. I stand up and try to yank my trousers up quickly while my tics and gravity inevitably pull me downwards.
Every trip to the loo ends with the familiar thud of my kneepads hitting the floor. I leave the toilet every time thinking there must be a better way of doing this – but if there is, I’m yet to discover it.