I was hanging out at the castle this evening with Leftwing Idiot, Poppy and Fran. All of a sudden I began ticcing about baby names.

“I’m going to name my child ‘Fruit Bowl’ or ‘Bowl Head’.”
“I’m going to call my child ‘Fish Finger’.”
“’Chopsticks’ is a good name for a boy.”
“Would you like a little girl called ‘Sheepdog’?”

Naturally everyone was puzzled by my choices. I tried to get each of them to agree to let my tics name their first-born child but none of them seemed keen. Leftwing Idiot thought there must be somebody somewhere who’d be up for it, so if you’re about to become a parent and are need inspiration for a name maybe I can help.