Thump-A-Youth Man

I was sitting outside a pub tonight with my friend Kyle when a passing stranger saw me and stopped. “Oh my God, it’s you,” he said. I’d started rifling through my mind trying to identify him when he told me “I thumped a youth for you the other day.” That didn’t clarify anything.

“You’ve got Tourettes Syndrome, right? There were some youths laughing at you on the bus, you got off and I told one of them not to laugh. He carried on, so I thumped him. Wham!”

A detailed re-enactment of the thumping followed. I told him I appreciated the sentiment but wasn’t entirely sure about the level of violence.

He carried on, “You can’t laugh, that’s not on. Disabilities are cool.” He stepped back to allow a man using a wheelchair to pass. “They shouldn’t laugh like that. You can’t help it. It’s Tourettes.”

I think Thump-A-Youth Man could see I was surprised. He told me he wouldn’t normally do something like that.

“I got off the bus, walked round the corner and called my missus. I told her what had happened and started crying. Then she started crying.”

Thump-A-Youth Man assured me he was looking out for me and disappeared into the night.

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