King Russell’s mate Sam came over this evening and I was working on my blog while we were all watching TV. I left the room for a moment and when I got back I found the following on the screen:

“Testing testing, touch typing is possible but quite tricky.”…

My tics can make it hard for me to settle down and get to sleep but usually I wake up only a couple of times during the night. Every now and again though, I’ll wake up many, many times and that’s what happened last night.…

When I was younger, I had a tic that made me bite my sister. This would often happen when we were sitting next to each other at meal times. I haven’t done it for years but his morning I was standing behind her in the kitchen when I ticced, “I’m not going to bite you.”…

In earlier entries I’ve described how, when I’ve bought presents for people, I can’t stop myself from telling them what I’ve bought. In fact, buying anything can be challenging because I find it almost impossible to avoid shouting out my pin number when it’s time to pay.…

My mate Ollie’s just cooked a massive meal. For dessert we had ice-lollies. More of mine ended up on my forehead than in my mouth because I kept bashing my head with it. Fat Sister took it away and gave me some tissues.…

The radio was on in the cab as I was going to work this morning. It’s GCSE results day and young people were being interviewed about how well they’d done. Several hours later I ticced my own results:

“I have a GCSE in lungs.”…

Fat Sister and I had dinner with our mum this evening. I knew none of my more offensive tics would be a problem because she’s heard them all before, but her seventeen-year-old dog died last week and I wasn’t sure she’d be emotionally ready for my new “Mummy killed the dog” tic.…

Leftwing Idiot and I have taken to calling my camping cup my ‘special needs beaker.’ This evening, as we were going into his living room to watch a film, I asked him to carry my drink through because I was hitting my head with my fist.…

I was at Cartridge World where the man who served me asked a lot of questions about Tourettes after I’d told him that’s what I have. He said, “When you first came in I thought you were deaf and dumb and trying to attract someone’s attention.”…

In addition to my “I’m a baby” tic, I also now regularly say, “I’m a parent of a parent of…

… a partridge.”
… a papaya.”
… a piss.”
… a tortoise.”
… a baby.”