I often say that Tourettes is the most frequently misunderstood condition on the planet. Tonight I’m going to throw down a challenge and suggest it’s also the strangest condition there is. Here’s why…

At the weekend Poppy and I went to an exhibition at Somerset House.…

My bed was cold when I got into it last night so I pulled my duvet tightly round me and settled down to go to sleep. I hadn’t closed my blind but I didn’t want to leave my slowly-warming bed to close it, so I lay and looked out at the very familiar scene.…

One of the three children’s projects I help run is an adventure playground. Just a few weeks ago we were a no-slide playground – there wasn’t a single slide on site. Now we’re a three-slide playground!

A huge new structure which the children helped design and build has just been completed.…

I had a ‘ticcing fit’ in the toilet at work yesterday. I was able to pull the emergency cord and my support worker, Will, came to help me. It wasn’t safe for us to try and leave the room so, for much of the twenty-minute fit, I lay on the floor with Will carefully protecting my head.…

When Will and I were going through a park on our way to lunch a couple of days ago, my tics noticed a leaf falling from a tree and called out “Pull the cord, leaf!” It fluttered to the ground but I continued to shout instructions into the treetops:

“Stay on the trees, leaves.”…

The Globe on London’s South Bank is a replica of Shakespeare’s famous theatre, recreated as faithfully as possible and sited near the Elizabethan original. It has no seats so the audience must stand throughout each performance.

Zoë and I passed it the other day and she said, ‘It might be because I’m lazy, but I wouldn’t really fancy standing up for ages.’…

This morning I woke from a vivid dream feeling foolish for taking a silly risk. It took me a moment to realise I’d been dreaming and that I wasn’t about to get told off by my friends for dangerous decision-making.

Recalling the dream made me laugh, so for your amusement here it is:

I’d been to a hospital appointment in town by myself and for some reason I’d decided to experiment with walking through Covent Garden rather than using my wheelchair.…

Leftwing Idiot and I were having dinner together last night when I suddenly said:

“Salman Rushdie had AIDS.”

Leftwing Idiot did a double take and then with a quizzical look asked ‘Was that a tic?’ Surprised he’d had to ask, I said ‘Yes, of course’.…

Remember how my wheelchair broke at the beginning of the summer? Wheelchair Services declared it a write-off, and ordered an almost identical new one for me. But it took ages to come and well before it did, the original chair, which was still within warranty, was fixed.…

For several months now I’ve been ticcing a song accusing various friends of having inappropriate sexual relations with furniture and animals.

To start with the song focussed solely on Zoë and was sung loosely to the tune of My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean:

“Zoë had sex with a table,
Zoë had sex with a bin.…