• Moon, did you get fat with the stars?

• Would you like a touch screen bride?

• Fighter pilot Santa.

• Bob Marley, reindeer.

• The archbishop on the bus says, ‘Don’t eat crisps.’

• Bins behaving badly.

• Army of babies.

• Aliens are landing on your forehead.

• I'm making biscuits out of crack cocaine and marzipan.

• Do you want to tell Elton John he’s a mermaid?

• God loves scaffolders.

• Grow up geranium.

• High five Hitler.

• You have the manners of a mouse on crack.

• The sun and the moon went on the Jeremy Kyle Show last week.

• If your kitten has a revolver then you’re dead.

• I love ketchup on your mum.

• If your kitten has a revolver then you’re dead.

• Flowery Donkey and the Nightmare of Biscuit Street.

• You have the manners of a mouse on crack.