• I fucked a kiwi fruit until it died and went to heaven.

• Sign a treaty with a bear.

• Would you like the key to Batman’s foreskin?

• Alien flavoured dog fart.

• Aardvark Vagina Monologues

• Hans Solo Centre for Masturbation Excellence.

• Jesus and Basic Instinct are the same.

• Wilson the Butler and the Broom Cupboard of Hate.

• Good afternoon you dense sky of milk.

• There’s a diplodocus in my sandals taking Spanish.

• Silly putty.

• I love logs.

• John Humphrys has a waggy tail.

• Zombie apocalypse, Malcolm X speaking.

• Who’s got After-AIDS?

• Alien Barbados Donkey Training Company

• Jennifer Aniston’s a skinhead.

• 90% okay, 10% crisps.

• Softly spoken autumn.

• Batman died.