• If your kitten has a revolver then you’re dead.

• Jesus has a lightsaber.

• David Cameron made Nicki Minaj wet herself.

• Peacock bum.

• Phantom tadpole style

• I’ve got a unicorn horn on my head.

• Billy Bragg is not my mother, he’s just a dog who likes to wee on the cheese.

• Alka-Seltzer-moon.

• Peacock bum.

• Alien Hamstring Recovery Centre, catapult speaking.

• My cabbage patch doll has Down syndrome.

• Army of babies.

• And I said what about breakfast at Donkey Kong’s?

• Pesto, pesto, piss.

• Iain Duncan Goodhew Smith.

• I love horse tits.

• Hands up if you're a sheep.

• Tell the clouds to put some knickers on.

• Lunchbox of Notre Dame.

• Biscuit, are you wasted?